Saturday, January 19, 2019

Why I Hate Marketing

I truly hate marketing. With a passion. It's an unfortunate reality of my existence that I've been contemplating for a while now. I'm sure I'm not the only one who struggles with this, and I think I've finally pinpointed some reasons it's hard for me!


I think the biggest deal for me (and probably all people who hate marketing) is that it's not natural. It seems pretty normal to dislike things that you have to struggle to do well, whether that's spelling, running, or ... marketing.

Actually, I can't think of many people who love marketing. Yet those who do are often really good at it. So maybe there's a cause and effect there. Maybe those who like it enough to put the time into it get really good at it ... not the other way around. Maybe marketing is something that's always learned.

This is good, because it means there's hope for all of us! Some of us might have to work harder than others, but that's the way of the world. Learning is the easy part for me. Executing is the hard part, which brings me to my second reason I hate marketing.

It's strategic. That is not a negative thing! But the newer the strategies are to me, the more they feel like strategies. So, again, it comes down to how natural it feels. When marketing feels unnatural, I feel fake. I hear that at least for face-to-face marketing, how much you believe in what you're selling is a big factor in how likely someone is to go along with your spiel.

Another reason I tend to dislike marketing is somewhat selfish ... I don't want to be that person. When people flat-out, cold-lead market to me, I am instantly turned off. I'm talking about the person you barely know talking to you for the first time probably through social media and telling you how great something for sale is.

I never, ever want to the be the person annoying people with the "buy my stuff!" message. Because that totally overrides the greater point that people often really do have your best interest in mind. A product worked for them or they're a really great writer ... and they want you to know! That's not a bad thing.

I think the "bad" thing is when they lose all potential interest due to their approach. It's highly unfortunate.

The good news is that means it really comes down to how you market. I am never going to be  comfortable messaging every friend I have on Facebook and telling them about something I'm selling. That's just not me. That's fine.

Nor am I going to be comfortable bringing that I'm a self-published author with books for sale on Amazon the first time I talk to a stranger. That's just not me. And that's fine.

But eventually, I think all of us have to ask ourselves, how much of my hesitancy is driven by fear? Because while I want to be wise about my approach (which means I'll never be super bold), I don't want to hold back because I'm scared.

I mean ... if I won't bring up what I wrote when talking to a stranger at a writing conference where that's expected??? That's actually me being scared, not me trying to be considerate of others.

People will form conclusions and have preferences no matter how comfortable I try to make myself.

So I think another reason I hate marketing is because it's personal. For me, that means it's going to take me out of my comfort zone. In doing so, marketing will grow me.

I'm always going to have preferences, like not over-sharing and mainly marketing through social media. You have preferences too.

So what am I doing about this whole introvert-must-market situation? I'm marketing. I'm studying strategies, starting new accounts, posting about my books and health products more. And the more I do, the more I realize that I've wanted to all along. I've mostly been holding myself back. Time to work on that a little as I get better about marketing in general.
That was long, but a good look at my thought process, I hope. Do you enjoy marketing? What's your comfortable way of doing it?

16 comments:

  1. *poofs in*
    So I don't read your blog as regularly as I used to, but I saw marketing in the title and had to check it out. :D I absolutely love marketing, though I don't know how well I do it for my own books. (Much like you, I don't want to be "that person.") But yeah. I actually enjoy it enough that I hope to do it professionally someday — even though I used to think "I'm terrible at this and I never want to do it, ever." (As it turns out, though, I was terrible at it because I had no idea what I was doing; as soon as I learned a little more about it and how it works, I fell in love with it.)

    Most of what I know about marketing is aimed at companies and organizations, but it still applies to individual authors. (After all, a self-published author is basically her own small business.) And I think the most important parts of marketing are to know your brand, know your story, and then tell your story. Also, don't feel like doing marketing is just saying all the time "Hey, I have a book; buy it." The best way to sell products and gain followers is to create a presence that they welcome in their lives (whether that's by sharing fun #DailyDragon pictures like H.L. Burke, dispensing writing advice and words of wisdom like Bryan Davis, or calling people to epic adventures like Gillian Bronte Adams) so that when you say "Hey, by the way, I have a book," they respond, "Oh, cool; I'll check it out" — and they're more likely to actually check it out because they know you; they know the types of things you do; and they know they like what you have to offer. So, yeah. that's my basic principle of marketing. Do I do it very well for my own books? Not yet, but I'm working on it.

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    1. Awesome!! So you definitely fall into the "knowledge-equaled-love" category. That's so great!

      Your strategy is definitely one I keep hearing about. I'm coming across the phrase "add value" a lot. Because people need to be getting something for you (for free) before they'll be interested in buying from you. It's a relationship! So I guess where it gets tricky for me is how formulaic and strategic so much marketing is. It's hard for me to feel like I'm being relational AND a good marketer. xD

      But you make good points. I think we'll both get there eventually. Thanks so, so much for sharing your thoughts!

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  2. I am still building my platform, but I totally relate to not wanting to be /that/ person. This is why I won't get into any of the multi layer businesses that sell essential oils, plexus, and other stuff that means messaging all my friends just to try and take their money ;p I think I'd enjoy marketing, as I do like extroverted business, but I'll always be cautious to see the person and not just their wallet ;D

    keturahskorner.blogspot.com

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    1. Yes, this is SO hard for me! xD Ha, funny you should mention MLMs. I absolutely love the way their residual income works, but it seemed somewhat manipulative to me for a while too. With my sister as an oil person, I understand that how it's /supposed/ to work is having something you love to share about--sharing opportunities with friends. It just seems like it so rarely comes off that way.

      I personally have a hard time even sharing something I love precisely because it's going to make me money. That makes me feel kind of bad, even though I also know that it shouldn't most of the time. There's such a fine balance for me in sharing something I love (that will make me money) and holding back because I don't want to seem pushy or like I want money instead of someone else to be just as excited. *sigh* My current rule of thumb is to try and market by books like I would a friend's that I enjoyed. Because there's nothing weird about that!! xD

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  3. Thank you for posting about this. I relate very much to your reasons for hating marketing your work. As an author myself it's especially hard for me to market my books online via my FB page or whatnot because I feel like I'm expecting people or begging people to buy my product when that's not the case at all, I'm just giving info about new releases and my adventures as an author. It's a balance, for sure, because pushy marketers immediately turn me off, as well.

    Thank you for sharing! I am glad marketing is becoming easier for you and I hope it becomes even more so. :)

    -Bekah

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    1. I'm glad I'm not the only one who struggles with this! I think that sharing bits of your journey and updates without including a buy link every time is actually a great way to get yourself out there WITHOUT pushing your products on people. If people don't care ... OK then. But for those who do, they'll get invested if you're building a relationship (and their interest) through that. Still tricky, though!

      Thanks so much! Sounds like you've got a pretty good approach yourself, so I'm sure we'll both get there! <3

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  4. Great post! I loved hearing your thoughts on marketing! I'm with ya! It definitely takes some practice at getting used to small business marketing. And it is scary! Taking that first step, is so hard, especially when things don't go as planned. But you just keep learning and trying new things! Thanks for sharing this post!
    -Brooklyne

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    1. Ugh yes. WHY IS IT SO SCARY????? Live and learn is definitely part of it, which causes me to give a little grace to some other marketers as well.

      You're so welcome! Glad you found it helpful. :)

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  5. Girl, what's scary? The fact I legit have been facing this same thing and just reached the place you are! o-0 I was telling my dad last night how I never want to be fake or shallow! I want to HELP and inspire and share my stories... but while I work HARD to share and market and all... In the end, it's in God's Hands, so I have to do my part but trust Him to find the people who need to hear my voice. ♥

    Lovely post, Abi! God bless!

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    1. OMW that's amazing. Yes, trusting God is a huge part of it. I struggle to feel like I'm doing enough on my end, but opporunities and readers have definitely found me in ways that my marketing never could have caused, too. ;) Trying to find that balance where I'm doing my part and trusting God to bless that!

      Thanks for sharing where you're at with me. <3

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  6. I totally relate to this! Ugh. Being an introvert and trying to push your stuff on people is so difficult. But you're right, it's all about learning and growing and trying. What sort of things have helped you grow in this area?

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    1. Yessss -_- Honestly, watching other people with their ups and downs of marketing has helped me decide what I personally do and don't like. If someone's approach bugs me ... I'm probably not going to try it. ;P But if I'm surprised how an obvious marketing post still draws me in and peaks my interest, I'm more likely to try it.

      Because it really has been the trying that's helped me grow. All of my experimentation has been on social media so far because I'm waaaaaay more comfortable with that than I am in-person marketing. Heaven forbid! xD

      I hope that helps some. But know you are not the only one in the introverted marketer boat!

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  7. Yes, yes, yes! I LOVE taking the photos, but I always struggle with the captions. It's so hard not to sound braggy or oh-we're-awesome but you're also SUPPOSED to talk up your products. And I completely relate with sounding fake. Why is so hard to sound personal without sounding fake??

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    1. I DON'T KNOW *cries* It's a hard, scary thing. Because people are always like "Be yourself, be raw and authentic." But everyone else's version of that is so. not. mine. I think that's part of it. Trying to be someone else's version of personal will be fake /to you./ i'm trying to be better about just following my thought process in my Insta posts so that they're more "me" and less "strategy."

      But, hey, I think you do a fantabulous job with your photos!! You talk about the shoot or what's in the photo instead of "oh hey, /I/ took this and here's how much I charge." Getting stuff out there for people to make their own judgment call is important I think. You're doing great, so keep up the good work!

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  8. Girl - this post is so cool! Recently, as I was praying about my platform and pursuing publishing again, I had this huge fear of marketing. I don't want to "promote myself." It's not who I am. And this fear overwhelmed me, because I love writing but didn't want the other side of it.

    And then God stepped in. He showed me that marketing is a way I can love people and build relationships. And I'm so excited to do that! That's the person I want to be - to love through my books and social media.

    Anyway, your post was a blessing to me. Thanks for sharing, Abi! Marketing is one of those things we might not enjoy and struggle to do, but we can still do it with purpose. That excites me. =) Keep up the good work, girl!

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    1. Ha thanks! xD Oh my gosh, I totally understand that. I don't think I've ever had this huge fear of marketing (except at events), but ... it's there. And I'm just starting to realize how much it's there.

      EXACTLY!!! People keep telling me marketing is all about relationships and I'm just starting to see how that's even possible. Because reconciling loving someone and selling something to someone is a tricky thing for me.

      Aw, you're so sweet. <3 I'm so glad it reached you at the right time. We can totally do this with God and each other! :)

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